touch therapy

Cuddle Boundaries

“Please don’t touch me without my permission”

– Mr. Little Boy

For cuddling or touch to exist, there needs to be a relationship between the two partners. The kind of relationship that can define the type and extent to which the individuals can cuddle or touch each other. The way a married couple will cuddle will not be the same way the individuals in a platonic relationship will cuddle. This section contains the different types of relationships.

Queer Platonic (QPRs)

Queer Platonic is a relationship that features intimacy and closeness between the partners involved. It could be a romantic relationship or a non-romantic relationship. Specifically, it involves a platonic relationship or a close emotional connection between two people. The intimacy and level of commitment in a Queer Platonic relationship is greater than a romantic relationship. Some Queer Platonic relationships may or may not involve sex. Individuals in this relationship don’t consider themselves as best friends; it is far more than that, though to the onlooker they are seen as close friends. A Queer Platonic relationship can appear in whatever orientation the partners choose; either as a non-romantic or asexual relationship. You may hardly find two QPRs that are the same. One may involve kissing and/or sex while the other does not involve either or both of them.


A romantic relationship is often defined as a sexual relationship. This is a general perception as not all romantic relationships are attached to sex or amorous affairs.
By definition, a romantic relationship is an intimate relationship where the involved partners respect each other. It is an emotional connection that may involve physical but not necessarily sexual intercourse. Essentially, it is an intimate relationship that provides two individuals the foundation to grow in their personal lives


The term platonic relationship refers to a relationship that has a degree of intimacy between two partners. What makes this relationship stand out amongst others is the absence of sexual activities. Yes, there is no sexual activity in platonic relationships despite the closeness and emotions being shared by the two parties. Boundaries A healthy relationship is one with boundaries. When boundaries are properly defined and respected, it will go a long way in making your relationship last longer. These boundaries can often be crossed based on mutual understanding. If boundaries are always broken, then there is a need to set up a wall. These walls could be distance, abstinence or restrictions. Relationships with boundaries bring the feelings of both parties into consideration. In less healthy relationships where boundaries are not respected, the partners involved function by assumptions. They believe their partner feels the same way they do. They are not concerned or bothered by the consequences of breaching their partner’s boundaries. Boundaries in a non-romantic, asexual or romantic relationship is very crucial. It enables each partner to avoid violating the intimate space of their partner. It is also very important to clearly communicate boundaries to our partners. This makes us feel safe and happier in our relationships.

What are Boundaries in a Relationship?

Defining of trigger words In this regard, there is a need for the clarity of language to be used; especially those words that hurt. It is important to discuss words that remind you of your past negative experiences.

Agreeing on what you tell friends If you have friends that you share intimate information about your relationships, it will be best to tell your partner about them. You and your partner will decide the extent of the information your friends should know about the relationship. The most important thing is for both of you to be in agreement on such a sensitive issue.

Setting sexual boundaries Being in a committed relationship doesn’t mean there shouldn’t be sexual boundaries. Determining what to do and what not to do to or with your partner is important.

Deciding what’s off-limits to share It is very important to set a boundary such as what is off-limits to share; this makes each partner feel more comfortable in the relationship.

The Importance of Boundaries None wants to be controlled but that is what most people do in their relationships which often brings untimely doom. We want to be in charge of everything and want our partner to do only what we perceive to be right. This is unfair. A relationship in this direction is heading towards disintegration. When boundaries are set, you create a mutually understood relationship; a relationship filled with respect and love. It makes for maintaining a successful relationship. It makes you feel safe and heard.

The Importance of Consent and How to Communicate Consent is the permission given to you by your partner to do something or break certain boundaries. It means the person is aware of the forthcoming event and knows about its possible consequence. They can even say no if they change their mind at any point in time and the refusal should be honored. Consent and boundaries work together. When your partner declines a move, it means they’ve created a boundary and breaking this boundary without consent is unhealthy in a relationship. In a purposeful relationship, consent is very important. It is the responsibility of the two parties in a relationship to make sure that they feel comfortable and safe with each other. The way you behave or your actions towards your partner will surely have an effect on their feelings about you and it will deeply affect the relationship either positively or negatively. Importance of Consent Prior to making a decision in a relationship, the consent of both individuals involved should be obtained. When the two parties give consent to an action and the action yields undesirable results, they will both walk through its consequence together rather than one party throwing the blame. For the sake of emphasis, consent is required in all relationship dealings, particularly one that includes sexual intimacy. There should always be a consensual sexual activity regardless of the level of intimacy. It is against the law to go against the will of your partner. It’s not just a crime but the emotional trauma it evokes may last forever. How to Communicate If you want to gain the consent of your partner, there is a need for communication and getting a feedback – Yes or No.

Communicating is an art that allows for feedback. – You must be honest and the following tips will guide your communication so as to positively win your partner’s consent: replica rolex watches

Be Confident

Everyone acknowledges the bold; so, start being confident Confidence attracts or makes a person pay total attention to you. It makes you look great and worth people’s time. Be honest, don’t be manipulative. Be respectful, and be receptive.

Show Interest

Great communication means giving space to the person you are communicating with and understanding that they need to understand you. This understanding cannot be achieved if there is constant rambling during a conversation. Be as clear as possible and show interest in being understood. You should also be able to make others feel free and confident to talk about themselves instead of just listening to you..

Listen Twice, Speak Once

It’s important to give the other person your undivided attention when they are talking as this will lead to an ease and flow. The ability to exercise patience while listening to your partner’s reasons will create the room for smooth-sailing communication..

Do Not Attack

To get your partner’s consent, you should be careful with your choice of words as well as your tone of voice. Harsh words can sound like an attack which can make your partner go on the defense and feel less receptive to your message.

Be Honest

The truth hurts most of the time but it is necessary for a healthy relationship. You should learn how to be honest with your partner. Make your motives open and very easy to understand. Once your partner senses an ulterior motive, it becomes hard to fully trust you.

Check Your Body Language

Knowing how to use body language to maintain an effective and efficient communication will give you an opportunity of gaining consent from your partner. Make sure you give your partner the undivided attention he/she deserves and do not engage in any other activities like playing with your phone during a conversation.

Would like to read or learn more? – We would recommend you to read some of our other related blogs or books or videos.

Read more

Empty Nester Cuddling Therapy

“There is a myth of the slippery slope that non-sexual touch inevitably leads to sexual touch, which is unfounded, scientifically unsupported and basically is paranoid. It’s pretty crazy actually if we just look at it. The assumption that soothing touch leads to sexual touch is nonsensical. In spite of numerous therapeutic approaches, theories and practices that systematically and effectively use touch in therapy, it has been marginalized, forbidden, called a taboo, often sexualized and at times criminalized by many schools and ethicists, licensing boards as well.” – Ofer Zur

Read more

Professional Cuddler

“This is what it means to be loved… When someone wants to touch you… to be tender…”

Banana Yoshimoto

It is very essential to touch or hug the people we love. Firstly, hugs evoke a child’s sense of protection. Given the fact that touch pacifies the soul and lessens anxiety, it is no news that everyone needs touch.

A lifelong touch is necessary for a person and scientists have supported this found through studies and research that touch mostly stimulates the central nervous system. It also strengthens the immune system and enhances the secretion of the hormones oxytocin, endorphins, dopamine and serotonin which makes us feel good. Parents are urged to always calm small children with their soft touch. This enhances their mental and physical development.

Children who didn’t receive sufficient affectionate physical contact will more than likely develop anti-social tendencies and emotional challenges at a later age. Children are not the only benefactors of Touch. Both married and single people need to be touched to improve their psychological wellbeing.

There is a segment of human beings who are lonely or touch deprived due to unavoidable circumstances and they are uncomfortable with social scenes. One of the options for such people could be to engage the service of a Professional Cuddler. Professional Cuddlers help you with touching, hugging and conversations, an awesome massage as well as offering a platonic relationship such as going out to dinner, movies and so on. In other words, any platonic activities that a friend can do with you, can also be done by a Professional Cuddler; however, it’s important for you to understand the ethics of the profession so as not to do or expect things that are against the profession.

For the purpose of better understanding, the following highlights the benefits of touch in the lives of human beings.

√ It relieves stress.

While the importance of touch cannot be ruled out in relationships, it helps to reduce stress on the wailing partner. Due to the release of the oxytocin or feel-good hormones, it induces relaxation, therefore reducing stress. Just imagine how relaxed you feel when your partner cuddles you. This will make you always eager to come home to your partner for some cuddles; which in turn, increases the longevity and quality of your relationship.

√ Touch is good for your health.

When you express affection to your partner through touch, you don’t just keep your relationship healthy, you also keep yourself and your partner healthy. This is due to the release of oxytocin, dopamine, endorphins and serotonin, that are “love and feel good hormones” during touch. – It reduces your blood pressure and heart rate which makes you more resistant to heart diseases.

√ Better communication.

Regular touch is one of the best ways to communicate in a relationship. A sensitive touch can communicate more than 1000 words to your partner. It builds trust, which is one of the major prerequisites to a lasting relationship.

√ Touch demonstrates support.

To show and demonstrate support for your partner, particularly in a time of challenge, works wonders when it’s through touch. In fact, touch can show support more than mere words.. √ It makes you more optimistic. A good and lasting relationship is one that is always filled with life and positivity. Touch can bring positivity to a depressed person, rekindling their spirits and courage.

Would like to read or learn more? – We would recommend you to read some of our other related blogs or books or videos.

Read more

Touch and Relationship

“I felt that if he touched me, I’d die, and then the thought crawled into my brain that if he didn’t touch me, I’d die.”

Kitty Thomas

Relationships don’t just thrive by saying kind words to each other or buying an amazing present for one another. There are certain emotional connections that can only be created with the aid of touch. A consistent soft and tender touch can make a relationship gain much more meaning and strength.

A soft touch is not just a romantic gesture. It renders immense wellness for us. Who wouldn’t want a relationship where there is love and good health? Touch has the potential to save relationships that are being threatened due to a lack of intimacy and affectionate touch. Even sex is secondary. Cuddling possesses the great potential to hold to the center of peace, happiness and love. The increasing frequency of relationships and marriages crumbling these days is worrying. If you think it’s because of the dampening of a sexlife, it’s not a truism. In fact, it is a truism that more than half of married couples (male and female) still have sex outside the shores of their marriage. It is obvious that long-term and genuine relationships/marriage cannot be achieved only through sex. While sex is important in the lives of two partners, it should be noted that it is just one out of the many buckles that fasten a relationship/marriage. Trust is the fertile soil in which healthy relationships/marriage are the foundation for growth. It is an unarguable fact that violating the bond of trust is like putting a big crack in the soil. Knowingly or unknowingly, the big crack will yield unproductive soil. There is no argument in saying that trust is the pillar of a purposeful and successful relationship. And trust can be developed, restored and maintained by partners through cuddling. Cuddling is referred to as the ‘livewire’ of any typical relationship/marriage.

Based on the above, emotional links are cut short once there is an absence of cuddle between partners or couples. With this in free flow, disloyalty will creep in, damages occur and the dissolution of the relationship becomes inevitable. More importantly, the loyalty and fidelity of individuals in a relationship can be sealed by continuous emotional connection with their partners. It is very likely that an absence of cuddling – being an instrument of building trust, can cause trauma and betrayal of one another. While many people have tried to portray sex as a building block of relationships, it is continuously being spoken as a weak instrument for strengthening love and affection. In fact, there are a number of cases of partners who regularly have sex; yet they still cheat due to high libido. We will now examine the importance of touch and cuddling and its capability of sustaining long-term relationships and marriage. This is in an attempt to revive broken relationships and homes. Your attention is therefore called to the following narrative. A dating tip when you date someone – if both of you are more comfortable cuddling intimately each other for longer durations, there is a higher chance you both will bond well and more importantly there is a greater likelihood you will end up in a long-lasting lifetime relationship. Touch and relationships are inseparable variables.

Research has revealed the capacity and valuable role of touch and cuddling in strengthening relationships/marriage. It is fundamental to know that touch is an essential element in the development of our physical, emotional and social lives. Touch, however, is the elementary stage in the cuddling process.

More fundamentally, the art of touch cannot be ruled out in any given purposeful relationship. Looking at the two variables; touch and relationship; can one be isolated from the other? It’s impossible/ This is due to the fact that regular and consistent exchange of touch by partners will lead to the emotional investment between the partners or couples. As a result, the two variables are inseparable. It is time we prioritize touch with our partners. The ability of two partners to show intimacy and love in a relationship or marriage rests on the art of touch or cuddle. Touch is, indeed, an amazing way of communicating compassion, tenderness, love, gratitude and other awesome feelings of desire to your partner.

In the light of the foregoing, it is vividly clear that touch and purposeful relationship/marriage are two sides of a coin. That is to say, they are two inseparable variables

Would like to read or learn more? – We would recommend you to read some of our other related blogs or books or videos.

Read more